Sep 10, 2015

Girl asks, "So, what's your plan".

When faced with a difficult question like this, subtly take a deep breath and make an estimate of the situation. Remind yourself of the mission. Inform your instinct by getting all the facts, mustering all the possible answers and weighing one against the other. Consider as many angles as possible. Think of the possible impact, benefits and risks of each of your answers. Then calmly and quickly decide on the soundest answer.

This is when you dig deep into your desires and anxieties. This is where you apply what you've learned during training. This is the moment that could make or break you.

Remember: The SWAT Team leader must be alert, instinctive and decisive at all times.

Just Kidding. You don't really have to be like a Swat Team Leader to survive your first date. Actually, you must not be like that on your first date.

The first time I asked my wife out (that was before it became “us” and my goal at that time was to ask if I can pursue her), I made this disastrous but redeemable mistake of thinking first of all the possible consequences before saying anything. The result - I wasn't able to express my motives clearly and she became more confused than ever. And everyone knows that when a woman is confused, it’s not going to be good for the man. In retrospect, I could have simply asked, "Can I pursue you" and it would have been okay. We wouldn’t have to go on two more dates just to clear the air.

But praise be to God! His grace is always sufficient. He can redeem you from any dire situation even if it’s a result of your own foolishness. She, the woman of my dreams, the prettiest and the loveliest one for me, said "Yes" to me and we've been married now for 17 months.

On your first date with the woman you plan to marry, just be yourself and ask God to bless your time together and your relationship. A person with pure and honorable motives, regardless if his approach is effective or not, always gets blessed by God. But it doesn’t hurt if you fix your methods by getting counsel from other upright men who have been there and done that.


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