Jul 25, 2014

























I’m no courtship expert.

If there’s only one beautiful wife in the world, I’ve got her. But it’s by God’s grace alone that she miraculously accepted me into her life.

Nevertheless, I hope that this radically different perspective would shed light into the courtship mix-up that desirous, good-intentioned, young men so commonly find themselves in.

The goal of courtship is to determine if a man and a woman should get married or not but before a daughter can be given in marriage, a son needs to understand a few things.

1)    A son is reared up for leadership

Starting at an early age, a son’s identity as a leader is drilled into his head. He is prepared, prior to seeking a wife, to take on life’s daily grind - determining how to provide for a family, choosing responsibilities over hobbies, diligence over convenience - while desperately seeking God’s guidance for his plans and undertakings.   

2)    A son is taught HONOR

He treats the daughter with absolute purity and her parents with utmost respect. Only when the father gives him the approval can he focus on winning her affections. Physical boundaries are established to protect the daughter’s purity. The son knows that physical intimacy is a privilege sanctioned by God and is intended by Him to occur only in marriage.

3)    A son is groomed to be more refined and effective.

If he desires to have a wife, then he needs, on top of character, skills and probably prolonged bathing and proper grooming. A son needs help in moving towards women, in learning how to initiate a conversation and in becoming a more likable person, at least.


However, there are more casualties than success stories than ever before because the sad truth is, boys, nowadays, are not being “fathered”. And that’s the missing piece.

The good news for men who lacked a good “fathering” is that God is a Father. He generously gives wisdom to His sons without finding fault. He replaces the fear of not being able to provide with a creative mind and the ability to produce wealth and the backing that He owns everything. He doesn’t withhold anything good from those who walk with Him uprightly. He is a Father who gives His only Son so we can be called His sons, free to emulate Christ in His love for His bride – the Church.

The question is, will you trust Him to be the Father you never had?
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